goddamnit. i lost my oakley shades. meaning, i lost a part of me. no-lah, exaggerating only. i lost a quarter of me =/ it's not in my bag, not in my car, not in my house, not in donkee's car, not in donkee's house, not in virgo's house, not in FQ's house. then where on earth can it be!? whoever who found it..pllllleassssssssse rettttttuuurrrrrnnnn ittttt toooooo meeeeee! iii bbbeeegggg yoooouuu.*sobs* ;(
where the fuck are you?
i've got zillions of thoughts now on my mind. but i just don't know where to start. i don't even know if i'm supposed to voice it out here. this world is so complicated. i really wish it was simpler so that there will be no frowns, no tears, no fights, no arguements, no suicide, nothing. the world is changing. not for the better. but for the worse. i don't know about your life. but i know mine sucked big time. it sucked in terms of everything. family, love, financial, education, friendship, everything. people see me as someone who is happy and carefree all the time. but they don't fucking know the stories behind the mask that i've put on. how sad is that?
someone close don't trust me.
someone close don't understand me.
now who else can i rely on?
myself?
no way. i might just break down and die.
me, donkee, FQ, jie, jason, erina, kenwee and edmund actually had the courage to go all the way uphill to Genting yesterday night about 9 something when we are actually having our major exam week for the whole of this week and the whole of next week. it's the trials and finalssssss peopleeee. it's a last minute plan. hrmm, it's not too weird if they had the courage to go yesterday as they do not need to sit for any papers today. the weird thing is that I still had the courage to go when i'll be having my professional communication presentation today. i only prepare them this morning for your information. that presentation is over anyway. i think i did okay =/ just O-KAY.
so yeah, jason and edmund drove. did nothing much up there. we went there to release "stress" (yea right). at least that is what jie says-lah. hehehe. 3 idiots namely FQ, jie and kenwee went to casino. 1 idiot namely edmund was busy shooting his "enemies" in the arcade. jason and erina went to we don't know where. so, me and donkee went to have our cup of drink in starbucks because it's not like we can enter that goddamn-i-made-people-commit-suicide casino and we are so not interested in arcade games. only kiddo like edmund enjoy arcade games!! how lame. after awhile, all of them came to join me and donkee. heh heh heh. we left at about 2 something in the morning. made our next stop in gohtong jaya to have another round of drinks. no, actually we were there to look for food =) after that, we head back to home and i collapsed on my bed at 4am. kekekeke. we rock baby.
i must have listened to too much of joe featuring. mystical's stutter last time which resulted in me stuttering throughout the whole fucking 20 minutes of my professional conduct's presentation today. i bet the jury herself didn't know what on earth was i presenting about. i just threw away another 20 marks into the dirty klang river. *sigh*
i'm having a headache.
i'm feeling dizzy.
i'm bloody exhausted.
i'm desperate for some sleep.
which is merely impossible.
I REALLY NEED TO GET SOME SLEEP! but i can't. i need to study =/
i was wondering, how can someone who get to sleep soundly before exams and don't prepare much scores high marks at the end of the day? but for this, i've found the answer myself. i think they are just naturally smart. like DONKEE. on the other hand, how can someone who do not get to sleep much before exams and study like an asshole gets shitty marks? like ME. ahhhh, this world is fucking unfair. we all need some changes.
rachel sent me an sms right at the time when i was feeling goddamn frustrated while studying and preparing for my french presentation.
"i was very much impressed when you started off with your oral. i have no doubts about it. but for your practical, to me it was a COMPLETE DISAPPOINTMENT. i know you can do better than that. are you feeling very nervous?"
DAMNNNNN. of course i am nervous! i know i can do better-lah. but too nervous then whuttudo? die-lorh. *sigh*
i will not be free to post for these few days. so, meaning there will be less updates from me as my exams starts on monday. i need to study! the first paper would be that damn hotel management paper. arghhhhh. i've only done reading 4/10 of that paper. wish me luck people. or i shall see you peeps in hell.
a note to DH17 + DT17 bastards and bitches : stop studying-lah. you guys are smart enough to get Very Honourable with Congratulations from the jury. heeee. but anyway, all the best.
special note to those who have helped me throughout my ordeal : donkee, KC, virgo, rachel, vinnie, cylee, FQ, jie and kenwee. thanks alot people. owe you guys 1 roti canai or 1 milo ice each. you choose. HAHAHAHA.
going back to accompany my books now. see you!
